Over Browned Onoins

It starts with browning onions. Once, when passing through Mumbai, I spent the night with a woman who said the sign of a good wife was how well she browned onions. I never learned about her cooking skills, but I never had any intention of marrying her. Part of the magic of cooking is you can travel the world without leaving your kitchen. I've never been to Fiji. However, I had a better traveled dinner guest tell me I cook like a native. Does that make me a chef? Hardly! Of course, I believe the second you go calling yourself something, you're definitely not. You're just trying too hard. Because of this, I had a buddy say I was a philosopher. He stopped after I punched him in the throat and told him to stop calling me names.